This week’s blog topic is “My Greatest Weakness”.
Who wants to publicly, in a blog hop, admit to a weakness?
Not me! For one thing, weaknesses can be a turn-off. Tell the truth–though you truly feel compassion for the medical lamentations of Facebook friends, you’d really rather not have them go on, and on, and on, and you really, really don’t want to see the pictures, right?
And aren’t all of us authors supposed to put our best Manolo Blahnik forward on social media? (Or in my case, my best FitFlop or Asics?)
Right, well…I’m tempted to cop out this week and use a weakness like “I exercise too little”, or “I eat too much chocolate” but I won’t. Here’s my weakness:
I’m not Perfect
And I should be.
Which is part of a whole constellation of behaviors related to People-Pleasing.
A Verily blog post describes the syndrome quite well:
Ever since I was little, I’ve been concerned about what others think of me. Of course, everyone has some people-pleasing tendencies—who doesn’t want people to like them or make their parents proud? But for me, and for many women I know, the feeling of needing approval and not wanting to say no is pervasive—and makes us into borderline doormats.
I’m not a doormat, but I do struggle with saying “no”.
I imagine there are men who suffer from this syndrome, but it’s probably more common among women,
I think there’s something wonderful about people-pleasing women being able to go out into the workplace and abandon the dust bunnies, the unmade beds, and the older children for several hours a day. The obligation to show up at a workplace makes saying “no” to emotionally needy family and friends easier. It makes it easier to put our attention on money-generating, confidence-building tasks instead of trying to solve problems that aren’t really ours to solve.
But, in spite of being able to pursue careers, modern people-pleasing women don’t necessarily have it much better than those of earlier times. The cultural rule-enforcers of family/church/community have handed over their rulers, switches, and scarlet letters to cultural elites and the world-wide media. Mothers must hover like helicopters. Fashion models still have no butts. Eating carbs and red meat is verboten. And, egads, you are only allowed to drive a non-hybrid vehicle if it’s your private jet.
That last comment veered too far into a boring political topic. Please, please don’t be offended! It’s so hard to be approved and liked by everyone. It’s so hard to be perfect, LOL!
But do hop along with my fellow MFRW authors and see what they have to say on this topic.
Images: Wikimedia commons, housewife image credited to JosephineRN28 topic.